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    # 網聊和現場聊天的差異 ###### tags: `game` `blog` ## 網聊和現場聊天有什麼不同 我剛開始學game時,總是想把剛學會的技巧也用在網聊上,現在想想真的犯了很多錯誤。雖然網聊跟現場聊天的大方向都是要跑持高價值的框架,不要表現得needy,我覺得在建立男對女框架的細節以及力道的調整還是有所差別,一不小心犯錯,可能就導致熱號突然完全冷掉,所以我今天想分析一下網聊和現場聊天的差異。 ## 風險與意圖 進入比較之前,我想先介紹一下風險的概念,當我們在game的時候,說的每一句話都有不同的風險。越高風險的話越具有性意圖,**如果女生能接受,就會有很好的效果,你們的關係也會往前推進一小步,但如果失敗,就會直接爆掉**,女生可能再也不會回你。**最極端**的高風險的例子就是:「妳很性感」,「我想幹妳」等等。 反之,低風險的話就是朋友班的聊天,通常是不帶男女框架的閒聊,例如「妳哪裡人」,「妳做什麼工作?」,「喜歡吃什麼」等等。這種話題的特性是,**你不會因為說了這句話,而降低價值,但同時,就算女生回你了,你的話題也沒有前進,你還是停留在原點**。 當然也有降低風險,卻又能建立一些男女框架的方法,也就是所謂的推拉,冷讀女生的個性等等。比如女生說她喜歡逛街,你就可以猜,「所以妳是比較外相,喜歡往外跑的女生嗎」,往情緒面的方向帶,當然這還是要看熱度的。女生不熱,你這樣冷讀,還是一樣可能會被句點。 總之,你需要知道,**在game的整個流程中,我們都在調整我們說的話展露多少意圖,風險多高**。 ## 網路聊天 一般新手最常犯的錯誤是**不敢展露意圖**,也就是完全不敢冒任何風險,可能網路聊了幾個禮拜還不敢約出來。那你的確需要練習怎麼聊才不會變成朋友框架。 **但是**,開始學game之後很容易犯的一個錯誤是(至少我自己是),亂丟招式,或是**意圖太明顯,看起來可飢渴**,也沒有讀好女生的情緒水位,讓女生感到壓力很大。例如,我曾經搭訕一個當場聊的還可以的,回去開始line聊就直接丟邀約,現在想想其實那時當場也沒建立好框架,直接邀約真的是社交失連到極點。 說了這麼多,其實網聊基本上就是秉持穩穩的聊就好的原則。 推拉->篩選->邀約。 失敗的話就繼續循環一樣的流程,在女生熱度不高時,不要貿然說出高風險或是太needy的話。當熱度夠時,不要害怕邀約,要冒**適當的**風險。 最後想強調一點,**網聊絕對不要聊色**,因為這是高風險又非常沒有意義的行為。自己想想,要讓女生願意聊色,肯定要讓她很喜歡你,情緒水位也非常高。但**如果她真的這麼喜歡你,你直接約她基本上也會成功,那約出來不是更好嗎**?何必做聊色這種高風險的行為,就算成功也沒什麼用,失敗了只會讓你顯得很飢渴,馬上讓女生失去興趣。 唯一可以聊色的情形,只有女生真的很想聊,但你要分清楚,女生是在挖洞給你跳,還是真的想聊。如果她在挖洞,你一掉進去她就會失去興趣了。因此就算女生往性話題帶,我可能還是會推開一下,說「別急別急,我們才剛認識,慢慢來」之類的,以避免掉入陷阱。同時也展現你是豐盛的,並不是和其他男生一樣缺砲打。 ## 現場game 現場game容易犯的錯誤則完全相反,就是**不敢冒風險**,導致跟女生約會時火花不夠,最後她就失去興趣了。這就是新手常常第一次約會就失戀,約不出第二次的原因。自己想想看吧,非常多的男生都只敢在網路上在正妹ig留言,或是網路私訊,但是現場卻不敢展露意圖,只敢當個「好人」,這種男生滿街是,你如果繼續當這樣的人,怎麼吸引得到女生? 現場game跟網路聊最大的不同是,**你可以冒更多的風險**。為什麼?因為現場聊的時候,**不管你說什麼,女生基本上100%會回你,不會有已讀不回的情況**。也就是說,如果你有膽用說出你真正的想法,敢冒風險,就會有比網聊更好的效果。現場容錯率也比網聊還要高,做錯馬上可以微調,不像網聊女生一不讀不回,你就無力回天了。 一句「妳很可愛」你用在網聊,那你聽起來只是她的眾多宅男粉絲之一。但你如果有膽用在現場聊天,她可能就會會心一笑,給出正面的回應。這只是其中一個例子,如果你能在現場聊天用出推拉,篩選等等,都會有更好的效果。 那麼你要如何脫穎而出?答案就是你要勇於**冒更多的風險**,想想你在約會中,你能夠自在的肢體接觸嗎?你能開女生玩笑,或是嘴一下女生嗎?你做得出推拉,篩選嗎?你能主導跟女生的互動嗎?當你能作到這些的時候,**女生的情緒會受到你的影響,你會讓她體會到以前沒有過的感覺**,這樣她才會願意跟你出來第二次,第三次。如果你只敢打安全排,那她找其他熟的朋友來不就好了,有什麼原因要找剛認識的你?

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