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Scuttlebutt Faerie Rings

What are Faerie Rings?

In general, a faerie ring is a natually occurring ring or arc of mushrooms, connected underneath by fungus mycelieum.
Faerie Rings are an experiment to support Scuttlebutt contributors by grouping into small microsolidarity crews that gather for emotional support and cross-pollination.

This document is meant to provide a possible social protocol for those who want to participate in Faerie Rings, but is a work-in-progress as we learn more from the experiments to come, and is missing the squishy cultural feels that fertilize the soil in which Faerie Rings grow.

The hypothesis is that if we

  • practice listening to everyone speak
  • learn more about each others' stories
  • deepen our relationships with each other
  • explore challenges beyond our own abilities

then we will create fertile soil in our humyn network for more emotional resilience and capacity, to enable us to grow further together.

How to participate in a Faerie Ring

Groups every 3 months as a crew

Every 3 months, faerie rings will group into sets of ~6 members based on the match-making process. Each faerie ring will start with a pacemaker.

During the initial grouping stage, each faerie ring will decide:

  • when and where to gather every other week
    • what is best time given the timezones of each member

At the end of the grouping (after 3 months), each faerie ring will decide:

  • who wants to volunteer to join a different group for the next round of match-making
  • who wants to be the group's pacemaker for the next round

Gathers every other week in a circle

Every other week, each faerie ring will gather for check-ins:

  • everyone has a turn checking in:
    • "How's it going?"
    • "What are you arriving with?"[clarify]
    • "How are you feeling?"
    • "What's on top for you at the moment"
  • other formats are variable depending on the group:
    • focus question : for example,
      • "How did you come to where you are now?"
      • "What questions are you reflecting on at the moment?"
      • "What is a community that helped raise you?"
    • asks / offers : do you have something you'd like to get help with / to offer?
    • freestyle chats

Each gathering is facilitated by a host, who

  • reminds everyone of the gathering
    • e.g. create a (private) gathering on Scuttlebutt
  • decides on the format for the circle
  • opens and closes the circle
  • makes sure everyone gets to speak
  • passes the host role for the next gathering to another member of the group

Roles & Processes

Match-making

Every 3 months, we have a Faerie Ring match-making process, coordinated by the Match-Maker.

The intention is to cycle Faeire Rings, such that:

  • contributors cross-pollinate across many Faerie Rings over time
  • new contributors are able to join their first Faerie Ring
  • each Faerie Ring has members with compatible timezones
  • each Faerie Ring has a pacemaker to keep the group alive if things start to fall apart
  • all inter-personal blocks (when one person requests to not be in a group with another person) are respected

The process for match-making:

  1. At the end of every 3 month cycle, the Match-Maker SHOULD gather data:
  • who is staying in each Faerie Ring
  • who is leaving each Faerie Ring to join the pool for re-matching
  • who is new and wants to join their first Faerie Ring
  • if any inter-personal blocks exist within the network of Faerie Ring participants
  1. With the data, the Match-Maker MAY use an algorithm to generate new group matches, ensuring:
  • Every group contains ~6 people
  • Every group has a Pacemaker
  • Everyone in a group resides in a compatible timezone
  • Nobody in a group has requested to block another person in the group
  1. With the group matches, the Match-Maker MUST inform the respective Pacemakers of their group, so they may start the Faerie Ring private thread and begin the next 3 month cycle.

Pacemaker

Every Faerie Ring SHOULD have a Pacemaker: a person who

  • will keep the group alive if things fall apart
  • starts the initial private message thread once the group is formed
  • is available to support a conflict resolution process

Conflict Resolution

(Forked from the Root Systems conflict resolution process)

TODO name the conflict resolution process

1. If you see the conflict, name it

"Hey you two are maybe in a conflict, let's have a <NAME>"

Everyone has permission to name it, not a big deal.

Better to deal with conflict as it happens rather than let conflict build up over time.

2. Seek Support

"Who else should be in the room?"

Seek somebody outside the conflict, maybe the group's Pacemaker, maybe another group's Pacemaker, maybe a third-party if necessary.

3. Set Datetime and Prioritize

Schedule a 30-60 minute session, no longer than 7 days away max.

4. Listening and Looping

Hold a tightly facilitated process:

  • Prompt: what conflict are you feeling?
  • Person A shares, person B listens (2 mins)
  • Person B loops back, person A listens (1 min)
  • Person A clarifies and provides content/context, person B listens (1 min)
  • Person B loops back again, person A listens (1 min)
  • Thank you and swap

Continues until both parties feel heard.

Keep in mind:

  • Active listening
  • Connecting with own feelings
  • Sharing empathetic understanding of what was heard

Trust that what you say back is the right thing to say. Own the permission to paraphrase. Expect that the other person will tell you honestly whether they felt heard.

5. Problem Solving and Resolution

How can we repair and nurture this relationship?

Do we need to do this process again?

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