# Nine Steps to More Effective Parenting
## 1. Boosting Your Child's Self-Esteem
Kids start developing their sense of individuality as babies when they see themselves within their [parents'](https://i-ville.com/nine-steps-to-more-effective-parenting-for-parents-nemours-kidshealth/) eyes. Your kids follow your tone of voice, body language, and every expression. Your words and behaviors as a parent influence their development of [self-esteem](https://kidshealth.org/en/parents/self-esteem.html) more than anything else. Praising accomplishments, yet small, will make them feel proud; making kids do things independently will make them feel capable and strong. By difference, belittling comments or comparing a child negatively with another will make kids feel worthless.
Avoid making weighted statements or using words as weapons because you might give your child a wound in the heart. Expressions like "What a stupid thing to do!" or "You act more like a child than your little brother!" causes damage just as physical blows do.
Choose your words thoughtfully and be compassionate. Let your kids understand that everyone makes mistakes and that you still love them, even when they make a mistake.
## 2. Catch Kids Being Good
Have you ever ceased to think about how many times you react negatively to your kids on a given day? You may find yourself criticizing considerably more usually than complimenting. How would you feel about a supervisor who treated you with that much negative guidance, even if it was well-intentioned?
The more efficient approach is to catch kids doing something right. For example, "You made your bed without being asked — that's tremendous!" or "I was observing you were playing with your sister, and you were very patient." These remarks will do more to help good behavior over the long run than repeated scoldings.
Make a detail of finding something to praise every day. Be hospitable with rewards — your love, hugs, and compliments can work wonders and are often reward enough. Soon you will notice you are "becoming" more of the action you would like to see.

## 3. Set Limits and Be Constant With Your Discipline
Discipline is essential for every household. The idea of discipline is to help kids choose acceptable actions and learn self-control. They may question the limits you set for them, but they need those limits to mature into responsible adults.
Having house rules helps kids understand your expectations and develop self-control. For example, some restrictions might include: no [TV](https://kidshealth.org/en/parents/tv-habits.html) allowed until [homework](https://kidshealth.org/en/parents/homework.html) is done and no hitting, name-calling, or hurtful teasing.

## 4. Make Time for Your Kids
It's often problematic for parents and kids to get together for a family meal, let alone spend quality time together. But there is nothing kids would like more than a time with their parents. So make time with your kids, like talking to them about how they are doing or asking them if they want to go out for a family dinner; tell them this often. Many parents find it worthwhile to schedule together time with their kids. Create a "special night" each week to be together and let your kids help decide how to spend the time. You can also make a day where you would spend your day with your kids, like on the weekend. Kids who aren't receiving the attention they want from their parents often act out or misbehave because, in that way, they can have their parent's attention.