Mentor training workshop on mentoring and coaching === ###### tags: `OLS-5` `mentor-training` :::info - OLS-5 extra mentor catch up sessions for returning mentors - Condensed version of 360 training - Hosted by Yo - ==Zoom: https://us02web.zoom.us/j/84060967561?pwd=L2wreHNXNmt0VnA3U3padmlpeDRsQT09 Meeting ID: 840 6096 7561 Passcode: 358143== 17:00 UK time, March 23 (Group 3) ::: **Table of content** [TOC] ## Participants sign up *Name/pronouns (optional)/What is sitting 30 cm in the right of your laptop?* - Maurits Kok / Good question, would need to find my laptop first, otherwise pair of headphones - Lena Karvovskaya / a found a Lego journal (Ninjago) - Esther / she,her / Theres some embroidery stuff here - Yo / A pear-shaped handcream - Alex / an empty cup of coffe - Siobhan / a lot of stationery ## Question - favourite topics to cover today - Motivating mentees to lead - how to get people talking :D - On a very practical level - how to help me and my mentee keep track of multiple channels and stay organized - Esther: here for a refresher/ (well done trying to focus while eating apple yes..) - - ### Learning objectives * What is mentoring and how it works * Define mentor mentee relation * Use structured framework to develop mutually effective and engaging relation * Be prepared for challenges in mentoring journey * * ### Reflections *What is mentoring and how does it work* 1. What can mentoring relationship deliver? 2. The role, responsibilities and expectations of the mentor and the mentee 3. Exploring the critical skills and mindset of a mentor > [name=Malvika] > 1. Accountability, sharing insights from experiences, helping mentees identify right resources > 2. Communicating regularly, checking in and (re)setting and (re)evaluating expectations - which might change all the time + > 3. Gaining mentoring skills as we go along. Accepting that we don't know everything and my role as a mentor is to nudge my mentee in the right direction and not "push them" towards what I hope they would do. + > [name=Maurits] > 1. Appreciation for challenges within different skillsets, > 2. Listening (sounding board), guidance, motivating > 3. It's OK not to know everything, > [name=Siobhan] > 1. Sounding board, motivation, reflection > 2. Active, regular communication (especially with longer term interaction); goal setting; reflection > tutoring > 3. Safe space to explore ideas / less steering project in a specific direction > [name=Lena] > 1. A relatioship outside of standard work hyerarchy; sharing of experience, new perspective > 2. willignes to approach the challenge together, openness for new perspective, readiness both to speak and to listen > 3. Awareness of one's experience and blind spots; ability to reflect and to adjust; generosity; ability not to be judgemental > > [name=Esther] > 1. Sense of accomplishment, accountability, learning how someone else approaches things > 2. It is an advisory relationship: mentor should not be too dominating though and mentee should be open to the advice > 3. Be open to feedback > [name=Alex] > 1. Confidence > 2. Understand each other / Be assertive > 3. Ask the right questions **Notes** - Set goals and objectives and manage expectations around that goal - Allow mentees to hold accountability for their work - Increased access to professional network - identifying skill that you have and you can deliver but also identifying what is needed by your mentee and sharing those resources (contacts) with them - Empowering mentees. Listen for a deeper understanding. - Accountability lies with the mentee - Mentoring ≠ managing; the manager sets expectations and knows a lot about the area of work, a mentor may not, mentoring is light-touch, driven by the mentee ### Difference between **mentoring** and **coaching** | Mentoring | Coaching | | --------- | -------- | | **Advising** - Provide advice & guidance | **Asking** - Facilitate following a process | | Tend to have expertise in the subject | Coaches don't need to have expertise at all to coach someone (theoretically can coach anyone in anything) | | Share experience & guide a less-experienced colleague | Coaches may ask questions that can unlock a thought process unlike your own (constructive manner) | | May also use coaching skills | | ### What are the benefits? | Mentor | Mentee | | ------ | ------ | | Chance to give back and share your skills | Get to learn from someone who you look up to (maybe want to follow the same career path as them) | | Listening skills | Access to network of people and expertise | | New perspectives | New resources or sources of ideas | | going from "maker" to "helper" | Opportunity to reflect upon one's own progress and learning experience | | Facilitate and make a contribution to something you couldn't achieve on your own | Build trust in a long term (safe space) | | Learn from mentees | Professional development | | Build network | External / outside perspectives | | Comfortable in asking difficult questions | Career advancement | ### Mentoring mindset <!--![](https://i.imgur.com/ahN96Tz.png)--> - Do you want to share your knowledge and experience with others? - Do you enjoy encouraging and motivating others? - Are you comfortable asking challenging questions? - Do you want to contribute to other people's growth and success? - Are your prepared to invest your time on a regular basis? *We are not accountable for what they do or don't achieve, but we can help them navigate their direction* ### Mentoring Competencies <!--![](https://i.imgur.com/cqB1ItR.png)--> - Understanding others, behavioural awareness - Building meaningful relationship with a wide range of people - Communication skills - verbal and non-verbal - Communicating own experience through storytelling - Articultaing insights and translate them into mentee's world - Ensuring conversation has a conclusion, agreed action and insight *Set commitments before the end of the meeting - what will you talk about the next time you meet, what can your mentees do to have a constructive discussions the next time based on this commitment?* ### Different types of mentoring <!--![](https://i.imgur.com/EFtNcc4.png)--> - Role model - Specific issue - Career - Buddy ### What's your story? <!--![](https://i.imgur.com/OIajSEu.png)--> * What skills and competencies you have? * What experiences you have had that you can share? * What lessons you have learned? * What you have got right? What have you got worng? * What stories can you tell to help you make your point? * WHat resources or expertise would be useful for otherS? > [name=Malvika] > Skills: Resilience, empathy, problem solving, collaborative, goals setting > Experiences: Community, team-building, communication, design thinking in research, bioinformatics, research > Lessons: Leadership looks like everyone know what they are doing, but the reality is that everyone is learning as they go along. Helping other (collaboration) is the best way forward but you also need to check in with your self every now and then ti identify what you have learned and what you have achieved > What did I get right/wrong? - > Stories: PhD life, immigration, studies abroad, cultural context, stories from different community projects, OLS > Resources: Professional connections, computational training, bioinformatics, manangement tools ### Defining mentor-mentee relationship Explore the purpose of the relationship, define expectations - What _isn't_ the relationship? - Taking responsibility over success of the project - Personal experience way beyond the defined relationship - I'm not their supervisor: not end responsible for progress/stuffs - Do his job - what _is_ it? - How long? - How do you contact one another and when? - What is confidential? --- - What we need to do define/manage expectation? Ask right questions - what do you want to get out of this conversation? - What can we achieve today? - Based on what you learned, what did you find useful - challenging? How do use this new information? - if the mentee feels stuck, help them explore their situation but don't do things for them - Be their sounding board, but if they start demanding too much time you need to also state your expectation - remind your mentees about what you are there to offer (not doing the work for them) - You are not an additional member of their team or their line manager - you are not driving their performance but you are there to hold space where your mentees can reflect on their progress - they are accountable for their work - Duration of your commitment - 16 weeks in OLS - 30 minutes call (more if agreed upon) every 2 weeks - OLS confidentiality - Malvika will bring it back to the team ### Reflection activity 1. How will you get started with your mentee 2. what Questions will you ask to define the relationship and expectations 3. How will you ensure you remain on track **Notes** - Psychological contract with mentees: these are unwritten but you need to state that clearly. You should set a boundary. - You used the word "contracting": is it useful to have a written agreement (maybe more or less formal) setting out expectations? - being crystal clear about expectations and navigating conversation and progress around that - not allowing it to drift. - Purpose of mentoring: learning and development, advice on their career, give them options of what you can offer - Manage expectation: set measurable goals and expectations, check in every now and then to see what is working and what we can do better. - Adding values: important to push the mentees to add value to the conversation ## Mentoring model 1. Define the outcome, issue, challenge, or ambitions. 2. Explore options and gain new understanding 3. Plan for actions --- - Mentoring and coaching are forward facing: Setting goals for tracking progress and supporting your mentees for their development and empowerment. - Backward form of support: Looking at the history of your mentee and providing training - it's counselor's job not mentor's :D - Allow mentees to lead the conversation and reflect on their progress. - What do you want from your conversation? - What do we want to achieve at the end of this call? - What have you done in the last week? What did you learn? Why is that relevant for your project? - What is our action plan? - what do we do next? how do we achieve that? - This will set a renewed understanding and come back to the next call with new objectives ### Defining outcome ### Exploration (strategies and methods) - active listening, remain focused and maintain rapport - Listening, rather than waiting your turn to speak - reflecting on what is being said, without necessarily immediately jumping into solution mode - Look at the issue from their perspective - ask open questions - - Anything that cannot be answered with a simple yes/no, questions starting with why, how, what, tell me more, etc - Open questions require thought/reflection to be answered. Allow multiple answers - requires an expansion type of answer - refer to the goal/agenda - you are there to listen, get the essence of what's going on, to identify if your mentee is on track - Using our emotional intelligence not to mirror our bias ### Asking effective questions: Open vs close questions: **Open Questions:** Mentee can have exploratory questions and answers - explore their thoughts more deeply: - **Closed Question:** Defined specific answer (yes/no) - commitment questions inhibit people to think deeper: Can/do/have you ...? ### Supportive and active listening 1. Repetition 2. Reflection of feeling 3. Reflection of meaning 4. Summary 5. Non-verbal techniques **Notes** - It's a good way to start a meeting with gentle question so we get to know what energy level our mentees have - But also not diverge too far from the commitment-based discussion relating to their work - Importance of listening and challenging our own ability to listen by asking open discussion ### Action planning - As a mentor - ask mentees to reflect and write down their goals, actions and outcome - Explore options for action and their consequences - Encourage new and creative ways of thinking - agree an action plan and summarise - monitor progress and evaluate outcomes ### Mentoring model: Practical exercise - **Mentoring one another in pairs - think of an issue in your real life and share. Take turns to mentor one another** - Define the outcome, issue, challenge or ambition - Explore options & gain new understanding - Action planning *It's about your mentee's experience and the value they get out of that* *Using the mentoring model and skills:* - I am stuck on XXX - I am not getting along with XXX in my team - I don't know where to go next - I am struggling to meet deadlines on my current project ### Measuring progress - keep an informal record - encourage feedback - reflect from both sides - define what has been acheved and how - project forward into further career **Notes** - Informal record: In OLS we have a hackMD notes with prompts and assignments - Encourage feedback: don't answer everything but explore - Reflection from both sides: Shared thinking ### Challenges Reflection: What challenges do you anticipate or worry about? - Mentee started later due to illness and has difficulties catching up. (Also new to GitHub, so there is a learning curve in general) I realized that I get lost pretty quickly too, so leading a fast catch up didn't go as planned. - Not to worry too much about whether they like the programme etc (since we're offering it for credits at the faculty it helps if people are positive about things!) - Finding their topic too interesting to not get involved hands-on - It's getting hard to hear their voices **Typical challenges** - Lack of self awareness - apathy/inertia - blame displacement - victim/martyr positioning - getting trapped in the narrative **Notes: The Role of acknowledging the spoil** - Getting trapped in narrative: by asking question or reflecting on what would this person ask in this situation - Empathy, and goal oriented question - Take a step back to understand what the real question/problem is - "I am going to reflect on what you are saying" - - Acknowledging the spoil: Start with "Can I have your permission to mention something here that might be unpleasant?" - Respond with "When you say this - what I hear - this may be discouraging" - Use empathy, address the issue, come back to what your mentee ## Questions to discuss later 1. How do you handle a mentorship relationship when it feels as if there is no chemistry/connection with a mentee? - Always have open discussions and get their feedback - Your relationship should not always be about chemistry but about what your conversation with them brings to the table - Check in if you need to re-contract somewhere 2. Who is playing the role of coach in OLS? - In OLS there is a blurry line between coach and mentor - we can use coaching techniques as a mentor 3. How do cultural differences affect the mentorship relationship? +1 - Being aware of cultural difference is important - Diversity is important for innovation, creation, and idea development - Demography may have a role in what your mentee want to achieve in career 4. Related to previous sentence, what about english speaking potential barriers? +1 - Asking your mentees what they need - do they understand you well? do they need translation? 5. Does a mentor always have to be someone other than the line manager? I would like to think of myself as mentoring my employees while I am also their line manager? - Line manager can mentor their staff and the relationship may last many years. - Often people want mentors from outside their industry 6. How to co-mentor? 2 mentors for a project, or involving another experts in the call. And on the flip side: several of us are mentoring teams rather than individuals: do you have any advice for this? - Co-mentors should chat about how they want to work with their mentees - get them together as teams and discuss where you can add value, come to an agreement - explain your roles - discuss the problem solving as a team ---- Open questions answers - what do you think ...? - tell me .. - describe to me ... - talk me through ... - How, what, where, when, why ...