# A Trialmin's Manifesto

BEHOLD /vg/STATION, FOR YOUR TRUE GOD IS HERE.
I AM WINDOWS, AKA OKHRANA, WITH A TOTAL PLAYTIME OF PROBABLY MORE THAN 5 HOURS (A LOT!), HERE TO FOREVER FIX YOUR SERVER.
YOU SEE, /vg/ PLAYERS, FOR TOO LONG YOUR SERVER HAS BEEN RIPPED APART BY POWERS WHO WISH TO CONTROL YOUR SERVER. THEY WISH TO STRIP AWAY THE FUN AND LEAVE IT ONLY FOR THEMSELVES.

WHO ARE THEY? WELL THAT IS A GOOD QUESTION
THEY ARE THE FURRIES, THE WEEBS, THE NEW-AGE TAJARAN PLAYERS WHO WISH TO DO NOTHING BUT TURN SERVERS INTO THEIR OWN PERSONAL SEKRIT CLUBZ AND ERP DENS. YOU ALL ARE AWARE OF THIS NOW, HOW LONG IT’S TAKEN TO REMOVE SOMETHING AS STUPID AS LOCKBOX BREAKAGE, HOW ANNOYING AND GRIEFY THEY HAVE BEEN, HOW AWFUL THEY ARE AS ADMINS, HOW THEY CONSTANTLY COVER FOR EACH OTHER AND PROTECT EACH OTHER, THEY ARE THE NEW TAJARAN AND DON’T DENY IT.
WE ALL REMEMBER THE MEOWFIA OF TEN YEARS PRIOR, WHERE HIGH ROLEPLAY SERVERS (AS IF THEY WEREN’T ALREADY SHIT) WERE RULED BY FURRIES FOR YEARS. THEY INFESTED THE CODE AND THE ADMINS, ALLOWING THEM TO HAVE DISTINCT GAMEPLAY ADVANTAGES AND BE ABLE TO KILL OR BAN YOU FOR BEING RACIST TOWARDS THEM, WHILE THEY WERE ALLOWED TO DO IT ALL THEY WANTED TO DO. BUT WHILE HIGH ROLEPLAY EVENTUALLY SAID ENOUGH WAS ENOUGH AND BANISHED THESE FILTHY CATS BACK TO THEIR SHITBOXES, /vg/ HAS REFUSED TO PUT THEIR FOOT DOWN AGAINST THESE DEGENERATES AND INSTEAD WELCOMED THEM WITH OPEN ARMS, EQUIVALENT TO THE CHINESE LETTING THE MONGOLIANS THROUGH THE GREAT WALL. YOUR SERVER HAS LEFT ITSELF IN A SITUATION WHERE THE MONGOLS, OR THE “FURRIES”, ARE BLENDING INTO THE CROWD, RANSACKING THE PLACE, SHITTING UP THE WALLS, AND INFILTRATING THE SYSTEM.

### SURELY, YOU SEE THE PROBLEM
YOU MUST APPROVE OF ME TO ENSURE THE ERASURE OF THE FURRY MENACE AND BRING /vg/ BACK ONCE AND FOR ALL. DON’T LIKE ME? TRUTH BE TOLD, I PROBABLY DON’T LIKE YOU EITHER. BUT THAT’S BESIDES THE POINT. IF YOU CAN’T STOMACH ME, THEN THINK OF IT AS GOING AGAINST THEM; FOR KEEPING THEM IS AGAINST YOUR OWN INTERESTS AND THIS SERVER’S FUTURE.
THEN, ONCE I AM IN, WE CAN BEGIN BRINGING THIS SERVER BACK TOGETHER. THE PLAYERS CAN ENJOY THIS GAME AGAIN, WITHOUT FEAR OF CONSTANT CHANGE THANKS TO VOX POX CODERS AND WEEABOO ADMINS CRYING AND BITCHING.
OR YOU WILL REJECT ME, AND YOU WILL LAY WASTE TO THE EXACT THINGS I WARNED YOU OF.

“b-but windows you’re a low rp shitter who has never typed an emote in his life!! you dont even care about this server!!”

**-- WRONG AGAIN, NEO-MEOWFIA --**
### FALL OF THE WEEBS, TURN OF THE NEW LEAF
THE VERY FIRST ACTION THAT I WILL TAKE AS AN ADMIN IS A PURGE OF EVERY SINGLE KNOWN WEEABOO OR FURRY ON THE STAFF. I FEEL AS THOUGH I NEED NOT LIST MANY OF THEM, FOR THEY WILL OUT THEMSELVES DURING MY INEVITABLE LANDSLIDE ENTRANCE, AND FREAK OUT. THIS ACTUALLY WILL MAKE MY JOB EASIER, AS THEY CAN GET REMOVED BY POMF INSTEAD OF ME HAVING TO DEAL WITH THEM. BESIDES,
THE GREEN LEAVES WILL FALL FROM THE TREES WITH A NEW AUTUMN COLOR, AND SIMILARLY THE GREEN-HAIRED POX WILL FALL DOUSED IN THEIR OWN BLUE BLOOD. THERE WILL BE NOT ONE OF THEM LEFT ALIVE.
WE WILL STRIP THEM OF THEIR POSITIONS, STRIP THEM OF THEIR BAD DRAGON SEX TOYS, AND BANISH THEM FROM THE SERVER ONCE AND FOR ALL.
ADDITIONALLY, THE HEADMINS WILL BE EXECUTED AS WELL FOR THEIR TREACHERY. WE WILL PUT THEM TO THE GALLOWS AND WHEN THEY OPEN THEIR MOUTHS TO SAY THEIR LAST WORDS I WILL UNLEASH THE FATTEST STREAM OF PISS EVER WITNESSED BY MORTAL MAN, ALL OF IT RIGHT IN. IT WILL ALSO BE HOSTED ON LIVE TV.

### PERMABANNING OF ALL FURRIES AND CONFIRMED NEO-MEOWFIA SPIES

“but who would you deadmin? would you get rid of the coders too? what if they’re one of the biggest contributors to /vg/ as a whole?”

THAT’S AN EXCELLENT QUESTION, DEAR PLAYER. I ASSURE YOU THAT IF YOU’VE BEEN PAYING ATTENTION, YOU WOULD KNOW EXACTLY WHO I AM GOING AFTER AND WHY. SLIPPERY SNAKES AND WEEBS ARE DETRIMENTAL TO A SERVER’S FUTURE AND WISH TO ONLY SUBVERT IT AND SMASH THE TRADITIONS, CULTURE AND FUN WE HAVE BUILT UP. THEY MUST BE ERADICATED.
AS SUCH, WE WILL NOT BE SIMPLY REMOVING THEM FROM THEIR POSITIONS ON THE STAFF, WE WILL ALSO BE PERMANENTLY BANNING THEM FROM THE SERVER USING RULE 0, FOR WHATEVER THE FUCK RULE 0 MEANS.

### REMOVAL OF ALL NON-HUMAN RACES
EVERY SINGLE NON-HUMAN RACE WILL BE REMOVED. NO IFS OR BUTS.
“b-but what about my hard mode race? what about my plasmen?”
THE HARD MODE RACE WILL BE SET TO NEGRO INSTEAD. YOU WILL RECEIVE LESS MONEY, NOT BE QUALIFIED FOR HEAD OF STAFF POSITIONS, HAVE AUTOMATIC GIZOOGLE TRANSLATIONS FOR ALL OF YOUR SPEECH, HAVE LESS GRIEF PROTECTIONS UNDER RULE 2, BUT AS A TRADEOFF HAVE A HIGHER CHANCE OF ROLLING FOR ANTAGONIST.
OTHER PLAYERS WILL STILL DISCRIMINATE AGAINST YOU, DON’T WORRY. IT WILL BE HARD, BUT THE COOLEST OF PLAYERS WILL RISE TO THE TOP AND STYLE ON THE ENTIRE PLAYERBASE AS A PROUD BLACK MAN. THE PASTY WHITE POWERGAMER HEAD OF SECURITY FEARS THE INDEPENDENT NEGRO GREYTIDER.
FUCK BUGS, FUCK GRAYS, AND MOST IMPORTANTLY FUCK VOX

### THE MANLINESS SCALE: THE ULTIMATE TOOL IN ADMINISTRATION AND PLAYER FILTERING
THE MANLINESS SCALE WILL BE OUR OWN SERVER'S SOCIAL CREDIT. SINCE ADMINS CLEARLY NEED AN EASIER TIME JUDGING THE COOL PLAYERS FROM THE WEEBS, THIS SYSTEM HAS BEEN DESIGNED SPECIFICALLY TO TRACK AND REWARD PLAYERS FOR BEING MANLY.
TO REPLACE THE BUTTON THAT LETS YOU CHOOSE YOUR ALIEN RACE, INSTEAD YOU WILL BE GIVEN A BUTTON TO SELECT YOUR CHEST HAIR. A CLEAN SHAVEN CHEST IS BAD AND SHOWS A LACK OF MANLINESS, BUT THE HIGHER YOUR MANLINESS IS THE MORE OPTIONS YOU GET TO PICK. WEAR YOUR MANLINESS WITH PRIDE.
“b-but how will it be enforced?”
ADMINS ARE ALREADY DOING IT FOR FREE AND ENJOY WATCHING PEOPLE PLAY THE GAME RATHER THAN PLAYING THE GAME THEMSELVES. AS A RESULT, THEY WILL BE OCCASIONALLY REQUESTED TO NOTE PLAYERS AT RANDOM BASED ON THEIR OVERALL ACTIONS. ARE THEY WEARING ARMOR, OR DO THEY HAVE NO ARMOR ON AND THEIR JUMPSUIT SET TO CASUAL? DO THEY FIGHT LIKE A MAN WITH A TOOLBOX OR SLITHER IN THE SHADOWS WITH BOLAS LIKE A SCARED NOT-SOLID SNAKE? DO THEY PREFER USING GUNS? WHAT KIND OF GUNS, BABY TASEY PEW PEW GUNS FOR THE NON-LETHALS OR MANLY SHOTGUNS, OR THE MANLIEST OPTION OF ALL: YOUR DANGEROUSLY ROBUST FISTS? ARE YOU A COOL DUDE WHO REPRESENTS AN IDEAL FOR THE SERVER, OR ARE YOU A LITTLE PANSY LONG-NOSED BABY BITCH WHO NEEDS EVERY ITEM IN THE SECURITY DEPARTMENT TO ASSIST YOU IN FURTHERING YOUR PANSY NATURE?

WHEN YOUR MANLINESS IS AT 0 OR BELOW, YOU CANNOT HAVE CHEST HAIR. SORRY, PAL.
GET LOWER THAN THAT AND DISABILITIES WILL BEGIN TO KICK IN. YOUR JUMPSUIT WILL NOW AUTOMATICALLY BE REPLACED BY A JUMPSKIRT, NOT A SEPARATE ITEM, BUT RATHER A MERE SPRITE CHANGE FORCED ONTO THOSE WHO ARE UNMANLY. IT WILL ALSO PROVIDE YOU WITH NEGATIVE ARMOR VALUES. ON TOP OF THIS, YOUR GRIEF PROTECTIONS UNDER RULE 2 WILL BEGIN TO LOWER, ENSURING PEOPLE WILL WANT TO MUG YOUR FRILLY ASS. AND I CAN ASSURE YOU, YOU WILL NOT BE MORE MOBILE.

THIS SYSTEM WILL BE HASTILY YET EFFICIENTLY CODED IN AND ADMINS WILL BE INSTRUCTED ON HOW TO ENFORCE IT. MAY THE BEST MAN WIN!

## FAQ :

“Windows doesn’t have experience on /vg/ at all! He can’t be admin!”
COMPLETE LIES AND ATTEMPTS AT MAKING ME SEEM LIKE A NON-VALID CANDIDATE. NOT ANYONE CAN BE AN ADMIN FOR /vg/, BUT I AM NOT JUST ANY REGULAR MAN. HOWEVER, ANYONE CAN SEE THE PROBLEMS THAT FALL UPON OUR PLAYERBASE TODAY. ALL IT TAKES IS SOMEONE WILLING TO FIX IT, AND THAT SOMEONE IS ME.
ALL IT TAKES IS THIS SERVER TO RECOGNIZE THAT I AM THE ONLY CANDIDATE TRULY WORTHY OF TAKING ON THE NEO-MEOWFIA. IF THEY REFUSE, THEN PERHAPS THIS SERVER IS ALREADY TOO FAR GONE.

“Windows just doesn’t know us. When he becomes an admin, he’ll see that we’re all really nice and he’ll have a change of heart.”
I DESPISE YOU. I HATE YOU WITH EVERY LAST BONE IN MY BODY, EVERY SKIN CELL, EVERY LITTLE HAIR ON MY CHEST, I LOATHE YOU WITH EVERYTHING IN MY BEING. YOU WILL NEVER GET TO ME AND YOU WILL NEVER CONVINCE ME THAT YOU ARE ANYTHING OTHER THAN SLIME AND SNAKES, HERE TO RUIN /vg/ AND BRING DOWN THE ENTIRETY OF THE SPACE STATION 13 COMMUNITY. YOU WILL BE PURGED. I AM NOT HERE TO LISTEN TO YOUR WORDS, I AM HERE TO SWING THE BLADE. I CAN SEE THROUGH YOUR LIES AND YOU WILL NOT ESCAPE.

“This is a shitpost. Can we delete this?”
THIS IS NOT A SHITPOST OR BAIT. THIS IS VERY REAL. YOU ARE ATTEMPTING TO MAKE IT SEEM LIKE I AM JUST HERE TO TROLL WHEN I AM HERE TO SAVE THIS SERVER FROM YOUR GRASP ONCE AND FOR ALL. BY CENSORING ME, YOU ONLY OUT YOURSELF AS THE TRUE FORCE TRYING TO CONTROL /vg/, AND THE ENEMY.

“Your black guy hard mode is racist!”
IF THE NEGRO GAMEPLAY MECHANIC ABOVE IS ENOUGH TO MAKE YOU RECOIL AND SAY I SHOULD NOT BE AN ADMIN, THEN YOU NEED TO GO BACK TO REDDIT. YOU ARE JUST TRYING TO SMEAR ME AS SOME CONTEMPTIBLE FOE WHEN IN TRUTH THE ENEMY DESERVING OF OUR IRE IS NONE OTHER THAN THE LIKES OF THE NEO-MEOWFIA. IT’S NOT LIKE MOST OF YOU DON’T RUN AROUND SAYING “POX” ALREADY, I MEAN THEY’RE FAGGOTS, I TRULY DESPISE V*X PLAYERS, AND IT’S NOT LIKE IT WOULDN’T BE FUN TO HAVE TRUE HARD MODE.

“Windows doesn’t even know who his enemies are. He’ll ban like, three people and be done with it.”
SURE, SURE, AND WHILE I’M BEING PUT INTO THE SEAT OF ADMINSHIP YOU PEOPLE TOTALLY WON’T HAVE TONS AND TONS OF CHATLOGS WHICH I CAN DIG THROUGH AND IMMEDIATELY DISCOVER WHO IS HIDING BEHIND THE CURTAIN. BESIDES, I ALREADY KNOW THAT ORANGES IS YOUR MASTER, AND CROSSEDFALL FOLLOWS CLOSELY BEHIND IN SECRET. CUT OFF THE HEAD AND YOU’RE HELPLESS.

“Windows won’t be able to do anything, the other admins will stop him.”
THE OTHER ADMINS ARE EITHER MY FRIENDS OR MY OBSTACLES. THEY WILL NOT STOP ME EITHER WAY.

WINDOWSERRORS FOR ADMIN 2022